Every year, I find this to be the most difficult week of Lent. Every year I'm surprised by that fact. You'd think I'd get with the program and possibly prepare myself.
Though,
ever year it's something different which resonates in my heart and calls me to reflect on my flawed nature. So, what could I possibly do to prepare?The response is of course, prayer. These mindful moments of my sinfulness call me into the depths more than any lofty experiences could. Standing before God in the knowledge that I am completely unworthy of His love is a painful and beautiful experience. All I have to do is look at the cross and the weight of Christ's death settles upon my soul. Christ chose me.
This isn't just some caviat that you hear over and over at any given talk at any given retreat. This is reality. Christ thirsted so much for my soul, and desired so much that I be clean one day, that he chose me. He chose to be scouraged, he chose to be mocked and he chose the cross, for me.
Each Holy Week, God asks me to trust him and jump without question into His love. My human frailness is never equipped to leap. To stand before the edge of His will and trust that His will is better than anything I could have pictured for myself. Each year he helps me in my littleness and inability. Do I trust in the resurrection? The answer of course is yes, but sometimes I need help leaping.
May the joy of Easter fill your heart.
