Sunday, September 6, 2009

Detachment

I've been given the word, September 13 the Eagle Eye Institute will open its doors for this year's class. The few days I have left before I leave will be spent hanging out with friends and family, tying up loose ends, and... packing.

Packing used to be easy: you take almost everything you own, stuff it in bags, suitcases an boxes, geometrically place all of it in the back of the family car and drive off into the wilderness. Pictured is what I brought with me to my first semester of college, sheesh!

Since those earlier days of packing up and heading to school I have realized something: I only use about one third of what I bring along. A semester abroad in Austria cured me of my need to bring EVERYTHING. The question becomes, "What do I really need?" This part of detaching myself, I'm okay with. I've done enough activities with the Community of St. John to know what to expect and what to bring along.

I'm leaving in a few days and the question running through my head now is, "How can I leave life in Iowa?" And the odd thing is that I never thought I'd say that. I love Iowa, but I had never really felt that attached to it. I came back after school to be close to my family before giving God a year of my life through Eagle Eye. I worked a very rewarding year at the Catholic Radio Station and was touched by the stories of the staff, the hosts and their listeners. My parents moved to South Carolina, giving me a nice place to visit and my brother and sister-in-law bought the house we grew up in.

So many changes in one year and yet I know that leaving Iowa is going to be the hardest part of beginning Eagle Eye. My older brother and his wife have two beautiful and amazing children, Roman and Judah. I've mentioned them before. As I write this, Judah is sleeping on my shoulder. It's the playful light in their eyes that will be hard to leave: the hugs, kisses, laughs and squeezes. It's the gentle and nurturing love Ruth Ann has for her boys and the steadfast friendship she shows me. It's the antics of my brothers as they make up games and tease me. It's in the friendships I have fostered and the wisdom of the women at Bible study.

One thing is certain, God is calling me to this life. He will provide me with the means to keep those I love close to my heart as I open it to new people and experiences. I can walk forward with the eyes of faith only because of He who walks with me.