Full Throttle

I was taping some receipts together today at work to make copies of them. One of my more glamorous and illustrious tasks during the day. This is usually the part where I think about reasons why I'm not where I'm supposed to be.

Today I was filled with a simple joy. It might be because the weather outside is so delightful. Birds singing, sun shining, and it's still breezy. It might be because I'm more active now that it's nice outside, I've taken a walk every day for a week now. It might be that I've kicked the caffeine haze from my slow downward slope of giving it up and now feel awake and refreshed in the morning.

Though all those reasons are good, the only one that can really explain my joy is that Christ is once again the center of my day. Go ahead and pick your jaw up off the floor from your shock at this statement.

For so many months I've been walking around in a daze. Going to daily Mass because I know it's good for me. Oversleeping a morning one, so straggling into an evening Mass when I'm tired, cranky and hungry. It's so easy for me to justify my lack of zeal and attention by a few simple words "at least I'm here." HA!

You do not make it to heaven by saying "at least I'm..." Not good enough. I realized today that my joy came from the attention I was able to stoke up for Mass this morning. My heart was open and thirsty and Christ certainly filled me up. These rare moments are glimpses of what my life could be like if I really let Him drive.

I wish I could live every day full throttle.