Checking In

I recently went to confession. The strength of this beautiful sacrament always fills me with awe.

One of my many goals is to discover how to live each stage of my life well. To be fully alive throughout my whole life. It's a hard mountain to climb and my second winds come from Confession. It's not always easy to continue to climb when I don't know how much further until I reach a peak.

This week the priest spoke with me about trusting God. He touched on the very thought that it's hard to always trust God when it's uncertain what the plan is. The wisdom he gave me was that God's plan is never static, it's constantly moving forward, and if you're living life fully alive you are always in God's plan. He advised that I take some time in prayer to check in to see where God is moving in my life.

God is moving in the silence. In this non-fulfillment of my vocational desires he is moving.

We are always called to hunger and thirst for truth, for fullness, for life itself! This paradox of not being satisfied with where I'm at and yet resting in the knowledge that His grace is sufficient is filling me right now. The audacity of hope is not something that's easy to define.

The challenge is to be fully alive and fully myself in all things. Never to hide behind fear or complacency, but dive fully into life. This trust that I so yearn for must be propelled by my firm resolve and desire for the fullness of life. If I am always striving to be more myself, I shall always be walking in God's plan for my life. The time will come and His timing will be better than my idea of perfection. For even when I do discover the fullness of my vocation the next journey will begin to discover how to live well that call.

Hope: It's a lifestyle choice.